I hate goodbyes.

I saw my boyfriend just now.






It may very well be the last time I see him before I fly off tomorrow.






Unless the gods stay on my side, and he doesn't have to work overtime or anything shit like that in the evening.
I feel selfish, but it would matter to me if he can send me off.




But I am in a dilemma.
Not able to see him tomorrow?
Or to go though the heartache of saying goodbye all over again.






What if I am not strong enough?